Saying casual sex destroys your ability to form meaningful romantic relationships is like saying that talking to a stranger at the bus stop takes away the meaning of your friendships.
do yoU EVER JUST GET LIKE SOOOOOOOO AFFECTIONATE ABOUT A PERSON LIKE WOW YOU LOVE THEM IMPOSSIBLY AND ITS JUST LIKE WHOA. WHOA YOU’RE ABOUT TO EXPLODE AND YOU GOTTA TELL THEM ABOUT AND MAYBE SING ABOUT IT AND DO A DANCE NUMBER ABOUT IT AND CLIMB ALL OVER THEM WITH AFFECTION
hey all, I’m not in danger or anything, but nice messages would very much be appreciated?
(been off hormones for two weeks thanks to doctor incompetence and really low and moody and exhausted. I am chatting with Darcyfriend, who is wonderful, though, so don’t worry if you don’t have spoons <3)
i basically assume that people don’t like me unless they explicitly tell me they like me and then periodically remind me
I have a few important things to say:
- Having a mental illness does not excuse you from being an asshole, and it does not free you of the obligation to really apologize and make it up to a person when you have caused them harm.
- You are allowed to terminate a friendship if a person’s mental illness is aggravating your own mental illness or personal issues and stressing you out.
- This has nothing to do with ‘dropping a person once they become an inconvenience’, it’s literally not being able to handle a person anymore because their health issues are negatively affecting your health, and you are not obligated to put up with that.
- You are permitted to remove toxic, stressful and abusive people from your life. Them being mentally ill does not make them not responsible for the bad things they do to you.
yes.
Reaffirm the shit out of your friends.
a very important post.
Always and forever, excessively.
Always do, always will. This world will try and eat us all up, our friends are all we’ve got.
So…friends, I’m sorry I’m bad at this friendship thing. I know I can be really intense, and I know I can also disappear for an obscenely long time and not even realise it. I’m working on those things, but that doesn’t mean I’m not still doing those and it doesn’t mean I might not be hurting you.
But what I do want to say is that I think all of you are lovely and I am so proud to know you. You are all these incredible individuals that make the world a better place just by existing. And sometimes when I think of you, my mind just fills up with so many feels that I store them in my cheeks like chipmunks and all I can do is make this face: :3 :3 :3
That face means I am very fond of you and appreciate your existence. Just so you know. <3
hey, yeah, can we not with this “testing people” thing
because if you feel the need to “test” someone then that means you’re trying to make them prove things to you without their knowledge. you are trying to control them. you are manipulating them. there are a variety of reasons people may not contact you first, including but not limited to
- they need alone time
- they prefer to be approached
- they’re too shy
- they feel smothered
- they’re tired
- they’re busy
- they’re directing their attention to other people (though not your expense because people can have multiple friends!!)
- it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t miss you
- or don’t like you
- you can’t read peoples’ minds
- don’t put words in their mouths
- it makes you look like an asshole
how about when you feel like your needs aren’t being met in a relationship, you fucking talk about it instead of being a jerk and doing this
YES THIS. Also:
this and the whole ‘if you love someone, let them go. if they love you, they’ll come back to you’ lead to some really fucked-up bullshit
namely that if they respect your boundaries and that you (apparently) don’t want to be around them any more, you write them off as ‘not caring enough’ or ‘not missing you’ - even if they’re crushed, and you accidentally cut someone out of your life who DID care a lot about you, which kind of defeats the point
and if they DO come back and try to ‘win you back’ anyway, that’s even WORSE: they’ve just proved that they think your ‘no’ is negotiable and they don’t respect your boundaries
I don’t want to blame people who do this ‘testing’, at all, because it’s heavily popularized and encouraged by abuse culture and all but
THIS IS NOT A GOOD RESULT, OK?!
